Quite an Undertaking: Devon's Story Read online

  I hid a smile behind my hand. Gail loved drama. “He took it okay, I guess. I don’t really know because I never broke up with anyone before.”

  She laughed. “You guys weren’t even going out.” Something seemed to dawn on her, and she asked hurriedly, “Hey, you haven’t gone out with anyone before, have you?”

  “No.”

  “Phew.”

  “Why ‘phew’ again?”

  “Because I don’t want to miss that. I want to see you happy. I mean you kept this secret of yours for almost three years. Three years!” Although she said it in a joking tone, I knew she was serious.

  “Oh, quit. That was the only thing I ever kept from you.” Except Rebecca. “I don’t have a secret lifestyle or anything.” Not really.

  “You know. I thought you liked Chris Spencer. Remember him in sixth grade? You always wanted to hang out with him.”

  I had to laugh. “Chris Spencer? Oh, my God. I just wanted to ride his bike.”

  Gail laughed with me. “His bike? I can’t believe we hung out with him all those times, and all you wanted to do was ride his…ride. Oh, man. I could have sworn you liked him.”

  “Chris? No way.”

  “You know what? I just figured something out.” She looked rather smug. “You like Jessica Alba, don’t you?”

  I didn’t say a word, but I knew my grin would tell her all she needed to know.

  Gail pushed me with her shoulder. “Oh, my God. I should have seen it! All those stupid magazines. I thought you liked the flame guy, and all this time you were in love with the invisible girl.”

  Gail didn’t know how right she was. Rebecca was turning into the invisible girl right at Grasse River High School. Lately, I’d only seen her during French, and we barely spoke to each other then. That was going to change, though, when my devilishly clever Operation Black-and-White began later.

  I looked around the cafeteria hopeful that Grasse River’s new invisible girl would actually show up. I couldn’t look too long because I didn’t want to catch Jessie’s eye. I knew exactly where Jessie was in the cafeteria because I had developed a kind of self-defense radar about her. That’s why I stayed in the crowds in the hallways and went straight to all my classes. At my locker, I was faster than a NASCAR pit crew. Constantly looking over my shoulder was getting old fast, though. I wished Rebecca would talk to me, so I could tell her about Jessie wanting to beat me up. Maybe she could get her to back off or something.

  Gail interrupted my thoughts. “Hey, you like someone, don’t you?”

  I couldn’t lie to her. “Yeah, I guess.” I felt myself blush.

  “Who is it?” Gail grabbed my arm as she scanned the cafeteria.

  “You don’t know them.” What a coward, I couldn’t even say the word ‘her’ to my best friend. I didn’t know if Gail knew Rebecca or not, but I wasn’t ready to reveal my crush yet. I mean, I wasn’t sure if I could get anywhere with Rebecca, anyway.

  “C’mon, try me. Is she here? In the cafeteria?”

  Talking like that with Gail felt weird, really weird, but it felt oddly freeing at the same time. “No, she hasn’t been here since…” I trailed off not sure I should tell Rebecca’s business.

  Gail leaned in closer always ready for good gossip. “Ooh, drama. She hasn’t been here since what?”

  I decided to tell her. “Since she broke up with her girlfriend last week.”

  “Oh, my God. I can’t believe there are, like, lesbians at Grasse River. That’s so…”

  “What?” I wasn’t sure if she was going to say, “gross” or “disgusting” or “creepy.”

  “Cool. That’s so cool. Who knew? It’s like a covert operation or something. Oh, my God. There must be gay guys around here, too.” She looked around the cafeteria with her eyes wide. “Ooh, do you think Frank’s gay? He’s kind of effeminate.”

  I had unleashed a madwoman. “I don’t know. It’s not like we have secret decoder rings or something.”

  “Okay, so tell me this. We’ve eaten lunch in this cafeteria practically every day for two and a half years, and during that whole time you’ve been checking out chicks?”

  I blushed furiously. “Keep your voice down. Just this year, I guess.”

  “How is it I’ve never noticed you doing this?”

  I tried my best to plaster a look of disbelief on my face. “One word. Travis.”

  She scrunched up her face. “Yeah, I guess I am preoccupied, but I like him so much it almost hurts.”

  I sighed. “I know the feeling.”

  “Oh, Dev, you got it bad. C’mon, who is it?”

  I looked at her with the most serious expression I could muster. “Not yet, okay? I’m still kind of new at this whole thing.”

  She tried her best boo-boo face on me, but I wasn’t Travis. I, unlike Travis, was immune to the Gail Marsters boo-boo face. “Nice try.”

  She shrugged. “Oh, well. It still works on Travis.”

  “Speaking of Travis.” I pointed to him as he made his way toward us. I watched Gail’s face light up when she spotted him. I felt a momentary twinge of envy. Would I ever have someone in my life that would make my face light up like that? Or, better yet, would someone’s face ever brighten for me?

  I PRACTICALLY HELD my breath waiting for Rebecca to come into the French class. Operation Black-and-White had begun. The new black and white panda bear sat squarely in the middle of her chair.

  My heart pounded when Rebecca finally came through the door. I kept my head down as if mesmerized by my French notes, but used peripheral vision to watch her. She stopped short, and I knew she must be looking at the panda. I tilted my head slightly, so I could see her better.

  “How cute.” She picked up the panda and hugged it.

  Aha, the scoreboard clicked over in my favor again, but I hoped the points counted this time.

  “Is this from you?” She hugged the panda again.

  I was sure my voice would betray me if I tried to speak, so I just nodded.

  She smiled even bigger and placed her backpack on the floor between us. “She’s adorable. Merci beaucoup, Devón.”

  I cleared my throat. “Je vous en prie.” She started blushing which I think made me blush even more.

  Mme Depardieu tapped on the white board with her marker. “Écoutez, s’il vous plaît.” She turned on the radio and an old pop song from the eighties played. She adjusted the volume and then stepped back.

  I looked at Rebecca with questions in my eyes and mouthed, “What is she doing?”

  Rebecca shrugged her shoulders and looked back down at her notebook.

  Mme Depardieu stood at the white board with the black marker in her hand while the radio played on her desk. A commercial came on when the song finished, and then I understood. Mme Depardieu had the radio tuned to a French station from Québec. The song had been in English, but the commercial was in French. When the DJ got back on the air, she spoke French as well.

  Mme Depardieu looked at all of us expectantly. I guess she figured we’d be as excited about French radio as she was.

  When another song came on, this one in French, Mme Depardieu turned off the radio. “French radio. I want you all to leesen to it. Leesen to the language flowing over zee airwaves. Ecoutez to zee language spoken outside of zis classroom. Ecoutez, and absorb zeh sound.”

  She wrote on the board, “Homework Assignment: 1. Find a French radio station.” She started to write down the numbers of a station, but shook her head. “No, you can find one on your own. Zare are several.” She continued to write on the board. “2: Listen for at least 10 minutes. 3: Write down what you heard.”

  Mme Depardieu said, “Make sure zat you hear some, euh, French duhring your ten minutes. I wanted to make it twenty minutes, but I’m afraid your pahrents might not want you to leesen to zeh radio for so long.”

  I had to laugh because I think Mme Depardieu gave our parents way too much power. Oh, well, I’d take it. I had a lot of other homework on top of the boys’ basket
ball game I had to go to later. I was going to interview Tiffany Bridges, the captain of the cheerleading squad. Funny how I assigned myself that particular interview.

  I stole a glance at Rebecca. She didn’t look my way, though.

  My heart filled with hope when I saw her clutching the panda bear with her left hand while she wrote down the assignment with her right.

  When the bell rang to end the class, Rebecca tucked the panda carefully on top of the books in her backpack. She smiled at me. “The sports section in the paper was awesome this morning.”

  “Thanks.” I smiled.

  “Thanks for the panda. I hate to run out so fast, but I have rehearsal.” She smiled again.

  I watched her leave the classroom, and my stomach got all googly. God, she was so beautiful. I loved everything about her. Her hands were so slim and gentle. I wished I could hold them. Her skin looked so smooth. I hoped someday I could reach out and touch her cheek. Her lips looked soft enough to kiss. And her eyes—

  I stopped my thoughts with a sudden realization. I clamped my lips shut and put my head down on the desk as things became crystal clear. Who was I to think that someone as beautiful as Rebecca Washington would ever be interested in a plain Jane like me? Even if I was black, she still wouldn’t like me. My eyes welled up with tears, and I took a deep breath to keep them at bay. I was an idiot to think that Operation Black-and-White would do any good at all. As reality set in, I think my heart broke all over again.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Skunk Day

  I STOOD IN front of my Grandparents’ new double headstone and pulled my coat tighter around me. My mom already had her turn with Grandma and Grandpa, and now she sat in the car while I had my turn. The cemetery people called my mom earlier in the day to tell her that the new headstone had been installed. I didn’t know any of this when the office aide walked into my French class and handed the note to Mme Depardieu who then handed it to me. My pulse started racing because the note told me to meet my mother at the main entrance right after school, but it didn’t say why. I thought maybe something had happened to my dad or Missy. Dad didn’t work directly with the machinery at Alum Castings because he was middle management, but, still, I didn’t know what was going on.

  Although it was still afternoon, I had to hurry to get my visit in with my grandparents before it got too dark. I squatted down. “Hey, Grandma and Grandpa, they put in a nice headstone. You guys would like it.” Both my Grandparents’ names were etched ornately on the double headstone, and I traced the outline of my grandmother’s name, Mildred B. Raines, absentmindedly. “You guys, I have some news. I came out to Gail. I know, I know, Missy told me not to, but Gail’s my best friend. Do you remember her? The one who never stops talking? Well, I actually got her to shut up for once when I told her about me. She was cool about it, too. Go figure. I told her at the mall. Before I told her, I found the neatest snow globe for you, Grandma. I started crying when I saw it. I know, what a baby. Right? Gail consoled me and then I felt better. Mom said you were probably with me at the mall, Grandma, and that’s why the snow globe caught my eye in the first place. Mom thinks that you and Grandpa are around us all the time and that you guys probably rode in the car with us to come here. That sounds nice. I kind of hope it’s true, but don’t go, like, appearing as ghosts or anything. That would freak me out, okay?”

  I stood up and brushed the light dusting of snow off the top of their new headstone. “Anyway, do you guys remember Rebecca? She brought me here in the hearse a couple of weeks ago? Well, on Monday I gave her a panda bear and, even though I got really depressed and thought maybe she didn’t like me, I decided to keep on giving her one stuffed animal every day. So Tuesday I gave her a penguin, Wednesday a zebra, Thursday the cow, and last Friday was a whale. That’s a lot, isn’t it? She seems to like them, but I’m still not sure how she feels about me. I should probably just leave her alone, but I’d already made up my stubborn mind to give her all of them, so today—today’s Monday in case you lost track—I gave her the Dalmatian. I have one toy left, and it’s a skunk, which I’m going to give her tomorrow. Do you think she’ll be insulted by a skunk? Do you think she’ll get a restraining order and have me arrested for harassment?” I laughed after I said it, but I was kind of serious, too.

  “You guys? Rebecca’s wrapped all the way around my heart, but she doesn’t seem to want me. What do I do?”

  I had tried to talk to Missy about Rebecca over the weekend, but she didn’t have much time for me with her final exams coming up. I think it was the first time Missy couldn’t help me with a problem. I wasn’t ready to confess to Gail about my brief foray into stalking Rebecca with stuffed animals, so Gail couldn’t help me either.

  “You guys,” I said out loud, “Rebecca held my hand. Right over there.” I looked to the spot where my mom sat in the car. “Rebecca seems so far away, though. Oh, I found out where she goes during lunch. I just came out and asked her in French last week. She has that dance concert on Friday, and she goes down to the dance studio to rehearse or practice or whatever you call it. She told me she goes to the studio, so she won’t have to see Jessie, but maybe she doesn’t want to see me, either. I mean, she has to see me in French, but...”

  I sighed and knew I had to wrap it up because the tip of my nose was starting to freeze in the mid-December cold.

  “I think it was more than her kindness toward me that made me fall in love with her. Yeah, I think I’m in love.” I smiled. “It’s her smile, her laugh, her dark brown eyes. It’s the way I can’t see anybody else if we’re in the same room and the way I can’t breathe when she’s around me. All those things got into my head and trickled down to my heart. If my skunk doesn’t get through to her tomorrow, then I’m giving up on her forever.”

  My head snapped up when I heard a car. Rebecca? No, just a minivan. My heart sank again.

  “I have to go, Grandma and Grandpa. I love you both. Oh, and if you have any influence up there, can you get Rebecca to like me?”

  I turned on my heels and hoped Mom had the heater on high.

  I COULDN’T BELIEVE my AP U.S. History Teacher, Mrs. Cameron, kept us after the bell, all because some stupid kids were talking. She told us that she was taking back the time we wasted. Teachers sure got cranky about that kind of thing. Unfortunately, Mrs. Cameron had no way of knowing it was skunk day and that I’d be late for French. Maybe I’d sneak him into Rebecca’s backpack when she wasn’t looking. Either way I was ready to bolt when Mrs. Cameron said the word.

  “Please remember,” Mrs. Cameron said, her eyes narrowed, “we have a lot of ground to cover, and we cannot waste a moment.” She kept us hanging for a few more seconds and then said, “Go!” and pointed toward the door.

  You would have thought we were in some kind of track sprint, that’s how fast everybody got up and raced toward the door. Unfortunately, everybody trying to get out at the same time created a bottleneck and almost sent me into a frenzy.

  Once I got through the door, I ran down the hallway to Mme Depardieu’s class. I got in the room just as the late bell rang. Rebecca was already in her seat. Darn.

  Rebecca watched me as I made my way to my seat. I almost looked behind me to see if she was looking at someone else because the expression on her face was one that I didn’t recognize. She was actually smiling. Even her eyes were smiling. She looked more relaxed than she had in weeks. I couldn’t help the smile that grew on my own face. It wasn’t quite the perma-grin of days gone by, but it was close.

  I put my backpack on the floor and was about to climb into my seat when I noticed a white bag on my chair. I picked it up carefully and then sat down quickly because Mme Depardieu was starting the class.

  I leaned toward Rebecca and whispered, “Is this from you?”

  She nodded, but then looked at the board when Mme Depardieu turned on the overhead with the day’s lesson. We were going to conjugate more subjunctives. How much fun was that? All I wanted to do was rip open that white bag and
see what was inside. I held the bag in my hands and tried to gauge the size of it. A box of some kind, a little smaller than my Rubik’s cube.

  Mme Depardieu rambled on and on about I’m not sure what. I know I took notes, I always took notes, but this time I had no idea what I was writing down. My brain wasn’t engaged on French. My brain focused on only two things—the package in my left hand and the way Rebecca had smiled at me when I walked in the room. I kept looking over at her whenever Mme Depardieu turned her back to the class, and Rebecca grinned at me every single time. It was like we were sharing some kind of secret, but I had no idea what that secret was, and I didn’t care. My heart was beating so hard, I knew everybody could hear it.

  I thought about the skunk in my backpack. Maybe I wouldn’t have to use the little stinker after all. After what seemed like six hundred years, Mme Depardieu finished up the notes from the overhead. She went behind her desk and picked up a plastic milk crate.

  I looked at Rebecca and shrugged as if to ask, “What is she up to now?”

  Rebecca raised her eyebrows and shook her head as if to say, “I have no idea.”

  I tried to sneak a peek into the package in my hand, but the paper made too much noise, so I rested the bag in my lap again.

  Mme Depardieu pulled out a stack of homemade CD’s. “Each one of zees is different. Let me explain what we’re going to do once everyone has a handout.”

  I put my pen down and reached for the handout from the kid in front of me. I had to put my pen down because I still clutched the white bag with my other hand.

  Mme Depardieu held up one of the CD’s. “On each CD eez a pop song. In French. Last week you listened to some French radio to, euh, get zeh feel for the language outside zee classroom, but zis week you are going to translate zee lyrics into English. The title of zis song is…” She turned the CD toward her, so she could read the title. “…Sans Coeur. Hmm, Je me demande de quoi celle-ci parle.”